A rose by any other name . . .

My entire life I have been one of many, many, many Jennifers. This has always bothered me and is something I'll keep in mind when naming my children so they won't be a "Jennifer R." for 18 years.

I found this really fun site and discovered Jennifer was the #1 name from 1970 until 1984. That is absolutely insane. I was born in the middle of that, so no wonder I will always be one of the many Jennifers. We're like the Jennifer generation (JENeration. Ha!). 14 years. Sheesh.

(Don't) Tase me, bro!

My brother-in-law Dave got a taser for his wife Rachel. It's a really cool taser--it has a laser sight so you know where you're shooting; it shoots up to about 15 feet; and the little harpoons don't have to stick into skin, they just have to be within 2 inches of the skin. So it's perfect for stopping criminals wearing parkas. (Not as effective as what my cousin can do [she rocks!], but it'll work until I learn to shoot.)

Also, it tases for 30 seconds as soon as you shoot it, so you shoot it and then have 30 seconds to flee. I love that feature. Oh, and if you have to use the taser in public and flee, like in a Walmart parking lot at 2:00 a.m. or something, if you file a police report Taser will replace your abandoned taser for free. How cool is that?!

As you can probably deduce from my taser gushing, Todd and I got the same taser. We figure it's a really good first line of defense, and I do enjoy the fact the taser goes for 30 seconds without you needing to press the button the entire time. Fleeing time is good.

Dave and Rach tested their taser, so they had a spent cartridge with the wires already out. So, as men are wont to do, Dave tested it on himself. And then asked for volunteers. And Todd did not disappoint him.

They taped the wires to Todd's shirt and . . . well, you'll see what happened.

If you ever want to be totally entertained, look at taser videos on YouTube. I don't know why people volunteer to be tasered. Or why people irk a cop with a taser.

But I do know I'm way (probably too much) excited about our taser.

Remember in Hocus Pocus when one of the witches rode a vacuum?

This post is about witches, and also about vacuums. Maybe not in that order. Or maybe it is.

Halloween is my favorite holiday. But I realized this year that I am a crappy fan. We didn't carve a pumpkin, wear costumes, or hand out candy (not that many kids trick-or-treat in our neighborhood any more. Lame.). At least I decorated.

We spent Halloween weekend with Todd's family and had a great time. His dad is the bishop of his ward, so they got lots of trick-or-treaters.

That afternoon we went to Gardner Village with Dave and Rachel and their kids. It's this surprisingly picturesque assortment of shops that displays lots of witches during Halloween. Lots of witches. They were so cool. They had some playing baseball, a witch flying over the creek, dancing witches, etc. It was so much fun to walk around and take pictures.


A month or so ago our vacuum died. This is the vacuum I bought four years ago for $89 at a post-Christmas sale. It was a tough vacuum that got the job done well enough. But then it croaked. And by croaked, I mean it made a nasty noise and emitted a burning smell . . . and sparked. So we stopped using it. And our floors got gross (because I am too lazy to sweep. Oh well.).

We went to Fry's one weekend because they were having a sale on a refurbished Dyson vacuum. We had a great time spending an hour looking at all the different types of vacuums (you know you're an adult when you get excited about appliances), and we were especially impressed by the refurbished vacuum that started it all.

So . . . now we have an awesome bagless spiffy vacuum that looks like a robot. My sister said we should name it Kitt, and I think we shall.

We're excited about the new vacuum, and although I loved the old Kenmore vacuum, I was really excited to leave it in the alley.

For my conservative readers

I like this quote and think I will use it as my mantra for the next four years.

"We've had awful leaders before. New York's atrocious affirmative action mayor, David Dinkins, gave way to Rudy Giuliani. Jimmy Carter gave way to the only great president of our lifetimes, Ronald Reagan. America will turn toward greatness again, once it realizes it has been tricked into temporarily embracing disgrace and decline."

-Van Helsing at www.rightwingnews.com/

Maybe this will be the reality check that returns conservative politicians to their roots.